Pirates of the Caribbean, part whatever

Cap\’n Jack Sparrow minced up to the corpse and gave it a kick. His nose twitched at the reek. Bits were coming off, bones were showing through. Populations of worms were building cities and contemplating opening a stock market and derivative-swaps.
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\”I think it\’s dead,\” he muttered, \”Done for. Gone.\”
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\”No, no,\” said the Disney executives, \”Look, it\’s moving.\”
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\”Gentlemen,\” pronounced Cap\’n Jack, \”I think the worms are moving. Not it.\”
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\”It\’s fine, look, we\’ll add another zero to your contract…\”
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Cap\’n Jack stopped, raised his eyebrows and squinted down at the thing in front of him. \”A miracle!\” he smiled. \”Who\’d\’a thought it. Aye.\”
***
And so \”Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides\” lurched to its feet and zombied down the red carpet.