Get an exclusive free story about Carey when he was a boy. Click here!Exclusive free story about Robert Carey, aged eight

HELSTON\’S HUMOROUS TANK TRAPS

Helston, Cornwall, is a pretty little town which is mainly famous for its Furry Day Dance  in May every year. The rest of the time it\’s fairly quiet and would probably like to attract more tourists.
***
Note to town council: this won\’t happen until you do something about the tank-traps on Coinagehall Street.
***
You see, in Cornwall the gutters tend to be quite heroic in proportions. I remember when we first moved to Cornwall, I looked at the street drains in Truro and thought \”Hm, I wonder why they\’re so big?\” Well, I found out why. It\’s because of the random monsoons we get here.
***
Helston has humorous ones. They\’re big, with a square ditch and deep enough that if you, say, accidentally back your car into one, the rear wheel is spinning out of contact with the ground. So the car can\’t drive back out again, even if you get lots of smoke coming off your tyres and helpful good Samaritan Helstonians trying to push you out of the tank trap and commenting that the same thing happened to someone the night before.
***
They\’re humorous because they\’re alongside designated half hour parking spaces with no indication at all that they exist – no signposts, no paint, not even a raised kerb – so if you don\’t know Helston and back into the space, say, you\’re really quite likely to go into one.
***
Ho ho ho.

1 Comment

  1. hollowspy says:

    Ha ha – I did that last week.

Leave a reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.