Get an exclusive free story about Carey when he was a boy. Click here!Exclusive free story about Robert Carey, aged eight

Grumpy

Bloody hell, it\’s a major pain in the bum only typing with one hand. It\’s so slow. Everything is slow. Getting dressed in the morning is epically slow and irritating, especially putting on my bra – which has to be both a marvel of engineering and a thing of beauty at the prices I normally pay. And indeed it is because it\’s from PrimaDonna who are expensive because they are French/Belgian and their bras are both marvels of engineering etc (see above, I can\’t be bothered to peck it out again.)
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They are however not really designed to be put on one-handed. The Research Doctor and I agreed yesterday that there\’s definitely a gap in the market for one-handed bras. No, I can\’t go braless and swing free – I might knock myself out.
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Stop sniggering at the back there, all you flat-chested pimple-pouters.

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